There is Time
you just have to take it
Stop. Stop and consider being alive in this moment, this day, this time, this life.
In 2010, Ursula Le Guin was inspired by her friend and fellow writer José Saramago to write a blog. I am currently reading her book No Time to Spare: Thinking About What Matters, a collection of selected blog posts. I’m only 17 pages in and am enjoying her wry and witty humor so much that I had to stop and write this while her words and my ideas were fresh. (I must confess I’ve never read any of her other 68! books.)
The first thing I learned from Le Guin is that the word essay also means attempt or try, from the French word 'essayer.' Isn’t all writing an attempt, as we try to communicate, convey, express, elaborate, embellish, and ultimately share our thoughts?
Filling out a questionnaire she received from Harvard in preparation for her 60th class reunion, she was alarmed by Question 18 - What do you do in your spare time? If you do the math, chances are everyone in that graduating class is likely 80+/- years old. Le Guin argues that all of her time is occupied, “I am going to be eighty-one next week. I have no time to spare.” No time to spare!?! I instantly thought, “Is there still time to be who I really am?” After pondering my reaction, I realized I panicked because there is so much more I want to do and create. There is more to express, more of the real me to pour out. I am still discovering myself. I have further to fly!
Yet this “no time to spare” mindset has motivated me most of my life. I found myself hurrying through my days, even when doing the most trivial of things. I wanted to get everything out of the way so I could work on the good stuff: my art. It was wearing me out. And more to the point, I was often too tired after doing all the “stuff” to do the art. I placated myself by saying, “There’s always tomorrow.” But for how long?
Luckily, I continue to have tomorrows, but they are often squandered on seemingly trivial, unending little things I rush through. It’s like I don’t think I deserve to take the time for my art until the minor stuff is done. I know that is so wrong, but it’s almost a lifetime habit of mine. I have always preferred delayed gratification, but why am I always delaying the thing that means the most to me? I treat my art like it’s a reward for getting my chores done; a mindset I can’t seem to shake.
But all of that is changing. I recently realized there is no need to hurry. Several times a day, I say to myself, “There is no need to hurry.” It is working. I am kinder to myself and am operating at a gentler pace. I do have time to spare. And I am no longer saving the art for last.
I am a healthy 72-year-old. Things are bound to happen going forward, which makes me all the more focused on the things I want to accomplish before my time is up. While my attention may be on future accomplishments, I’m taking life on a day-by-day approach. Centuries ago, Seneca wisely wrote, “One should count each day a separate life.” I’m taking it a step further -
Stop. Stop and consider being alive in this moment, this day, this time, this life.
What is important to me right now? That is what I will do.
Right now, sharing these thoughts with you is what’s important to me. Will you share your thoughts with me?
Quotes of the Week
It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.
Ursula K. Le Guin
Do all your work as though you had a thousand years to live, and as though you are going to die tomorrow.
Mother Ann Lees, founder of the Shaker movement.
Everything changed the day she figured out there was exactly enough time for the important things in her life.
Brian Andreas
Our day is really nothing else but an infinite number of open gates. And the creative process is nothing else but the step through the open gate of now and onto the path of creation.
Burghild Nina Holzer - The Walk Between Heaven and Earth
Not knowing when the dawn will come I open every door.
Emily Dickenson
Happy Anniversary Alisa. It’s a grand accomplishment. Send me the story if you can. We celebrate our 54th in 10 days. I hope we get 70 or more like you. Take care with that flu. A book sounds perfect.
I am 74 and find this to be true. I find joy in making, joy in studying to do better. I am also at a point in my life that I do not have to prove to anyone that I am an artist. I can say that freely. That took years. It also took the pleasure out of art when I could not say it. I am lucky to be able to do art. Yes, I ache from time to time. I have moments when I have to get a rest. But what keeps me wanting to get up, exercise, eat well, and move is getting to my creative self. I am a happy person to find this simple joy in life.