Looking Back to Move Forward

12 unexpected lessons learned

One of the greatest benefits of keeping a journal, a diary, or writing a blog is the ability to look back at what you wrote 1, 5, 10, 20, 40 years ago. At 71, I have reached a point where I am again asking the question, “Where do I want to do from here,” in both my life and my art practice. I have already concluded that I have further to fly in this lifetime but as for the art, I feel I am beginning anew again. Not exactly looking for my voice, but determining what and how I want to say going forward. Re-reading this 2014 blog post has reminded me of how I tackled a similar situation 10 years ago. I find it helpful and am hoping you will, too, no matter what form your art may take.

February 5, 2014

Background: The Studio Art Quilt Associates is having their annual conference in the Washington DC area this spring. As a long-time member of SAQA, I thought it would be a very good idea to have a regional show to highlight all the talent in our area. I asked a dear friend, Christine Adams, who has years of experience in this arena if she would co-chair it with me. The official SAQA 25th Anniversary show is appropriately entitled Celebrating Silver. We titled our show Tarnish. From the prospectus: 

Silver indeed does shine, but with time and exposure to the elements, that shine is transformed into tarnish, a form of patina, [which is one of my favorite words and was, for a long time, my password back in the early days of the Internet]. Silver and metal are not the only things to lose their luster, so do reputations, images, and dreams (especially here in the capital of the USA!)  Tarnish, is a layer of corrosion that affects the outer layers while protecting the underlying layers.  At its root, TARNISH means to dull.  What is hidden, concealed, or kept secret by the tarnish? How do we return and uncover that shine? Is the beauty in the shine or do you find beauty in the weathered patina of the tarnish?  Explore the theme of tarnish in a way that resonates for you.

I had an ulterior motive in spearheading this show. I knew that if I publicly encouraged others to enter this show I was going to have to set an example – in other words, I had to enter the show too.  I regularly promise myself that I will take the time to create another “show-worthy” quilt but my good intention always slides to the bottom of my to-do list. This slip-and-slide behavior has been going on for years. The more time that passes, the more disappointed I am in myself. So I did something that would make it inevitable, if for no other reason than to save face. Pride, as it turns out, is a great motivator after all.

As with all major art projects, 80% of my time is spent in the noodling or inspiration phase. I have enough experience to know that the Aha moment will come and I will know it when it does. My bright idea hit right before Christmas. There was “plenty” of time still left until the February 3rd deadline.

Tarnish is something I know quite well. I passed the family silver I received on to my daughters because I knew they could would take better care of it than I would. I saved what had the most meaning for me – my mother’s collection of silver baby cups and my own engraved cup circa 1952. I love these fiercely. I also love their tarnish. Polished silver is bright and beautiful, but tarnish creates a patina of color that makes me swoon. I gathered my collection of cups and took several photos in various compositions. I still wasn’t sure where I was going from there, but I knew the photos were my starting point. I spiffed up my photo a bit with some painterly filters and color improvements. And that’s when it hit me.

Spoonflower! I could turn one of my photos into a yard of fabric, quilt the fabric, and then paint over the photo. I placed my first Spoonflower order on December 21st and had a yard of my image in hand before the new year dawned. I have been working on my quilt for the last 30+ days.  The experience has been very enlightening. It turns out I wasn’t just making a quilt, I was learning a slew of unexpected lessons in the process. Lessons not just about quilting, but about myself and the practice of art in general.

Original photo

I share my Top Twelve with you here.

1. I am more interested in using fabric to tell a story than in having perfect quilting skills.

2. My machine quilting isn’t as bad as I thought it would be. There was some fear involved there.

3. Quilting has a history of too many rules that can tend to stifle the creativity of someone with a Catholic school upbringing who was raised to obey the rules.

4. It’s OK to ignore the rules and forge your own way.

5. I’d rather enjoy the process than aim for perfection.

6. Perfection kills passion.

7. When attempting your first quilt in 6+ years, do not start with a complex pattern involving primarily monochromatic colors. And do not add a filter to your photo that blurs the edges.

8. I’d rather work with bright colors.

9. When the “this was a horrible idea so why bother?” thinking kicks in, remember that means you’re close to getting done and push through the feeling and doubt.

10. It’s natural to want to make the best quilt, but I realized that being my best meant completing and submitting even an average quilt.

11. Everything takes longer than you think! I was going to do minimal quilting and more painting. I ended up with lots of quilting and minimal paint.

12. It’s not about the quilt.

    

    Finished quilt

So I ask you – what unexpected lesson(s) have you learned when making art? Are you wondering where you go from here? Care to share? I’d love to know. Please leave a comment, even if just to let me know what you’d like to read more of here at Further to Fly.

Quote of the Week

Looking back is a way to sharpen the focus on the things you want to change in your life. I think there's something about nostalgia that really puts a fine point on the here-and-now, and that can be incredibly fascinating and interesting and engaging for the mind. - Sarah Paulson